Tuesday, August 15, 2006

"I'm gonna go onstage, I'm gonna vomit, then light it on fire, and then I'm gonna eat it."

It is very rare that I pay $200ish to see a band at a big festival, and am so blown away by the the ferocity of the performance that I shell out another $35 to see them again a mere two months later. I guess technically there's just one that fits those specific qualifications, and that band is Sonic Youth.
With their help, I experienced a second rock'n'roll fantasy weekend. Yeah yeah Yeahs, Beirut, Deerhoof, Apollo sunshine, Sonic Youth, and a killer jazz band whose named still remains a mystery. I'm gonna skip the play-by-play breakdown (you can get your kicks from Max), but all involved pretty much blew my mind. AND to top that, yesterday we went to the beach!

But moving on, I feel there a few urgent issues I must address:
First I would like to make a statement to a certain group of men who are trapsing around New York wearing these little vintage runing shorts. What makes you think that those things look cool? Unless you're playing high school basketball in the 1970s you have NO BUSINESS wearing them. No one wants to see your white, spindly, hairy legs in their full glory within bright orange "practically hotpants," and more importantly I don't. Plus a lot of these tools aren't sporting what's necessary to insure full coverage of the uh, bathing suit area. "They're out; and there's nothing between them and us but a thin layer of cheap nylon."

Secondly I would like to add a second reason why I h8t the alias "The Man in the Brown Hat." Does anyone remember Reservoir Dogs? (I choose to assume that no one who reads this blog hasn't seen it.) There's this scene where Tarantino expressed discomfort with his code name "Mr. Brown." The reason, of course, is that calling him "Mr Brown" is basically calling him "Mr. Shit." Now then, why would you want to be The Man in the Shit Hat?
Hm?
Score:
MBH- 0
SH8H- 1

PS: I promise I'm going to post more soon. Really this time...

4 doubleshot soy lattes with no foam:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

Well I WANTED to go with the BLACK hat, but that was taken. It's better than the Man in the Fuscia Hat, though, right? Or do you have something hurtful to say about that, too?
Those shorts in the photo were worn with you in mind. Enjoy.

2:20 PM  
Blogger self-h8ting hipster said...

I guess... (pushing the button here) I didn't realize the Brown Hatta was so sensitive; my apologies.

6:43 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Sniff.

10:48 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

He says he's going to kick it into the audience, not eat it. That's gross. :D

6:42 PM  

Post a Comment

<< Home